Tuesday, July 29, 2008

woo hoo!

Ted got a new job! Thank you Lord. Just thought I'd share.

Monday, July 28, 2008

there are days...

Today I am so thankful that I know God.

Last year I met a young girl 19 years old at SmartyPants, sweet girl, 9 months pregnant. She was looking for something stretchy ;-) to wear.

After she had her baby girl, she needed bigger jeans, couldn't quite squeeze into size 0 anymore. She's been a regular shopper ever since, and although it seems a little odd as I have a daughter her age, we have become friends, in that she visits the store often, and we chat about everything under the sun.

When her little girl was about 3 months old, she announced one day that she was pregnant again. Yowzer I thought, so young and two babies? My how the mind forgets...that was me 18 years ago, I turned 21 a little over a month before my 2nd daughter Ashley was born.

Again, I helped her find stretchy tops, and she showed me ultrasound pictures. One day a cute 17 year old girl rushed thru the doors at SmartyPants to give me a message from my friend, she'd given birth to a baby boy, but his lungs weren't right. The family was on the way to the hospital and her sister had called her to come and tell me to pray for the baby.

Interesting, since never one time in over a year did I ever mention God. Regardless, I started to pray. At first just that God would be with the baby, oh and the young parents, guide the surgeons Lord, again please God comfort my young friend. But then here came the questions taking over my mind...so, God I know that you control everything, so seriously is this neccesarry? You give 2 young unwed parents not one human being to care for, but 2? and now a sick baby? WHY??

I know why, because it is part of His plan. Period. End of story.

Well, the young parents struggled for two months, feeling horrible guilt when either leaving their one year old with various family members or leaving their frail sick baby boy at the hospital alone. The one time I did see the young mom, her eyes were almost swollen shut, her face was puffy, she was as pale as a ghost, we were at a loss for words, I just gave her a hug, and she left the shop crying.

God had yet more hardship planned for this young couple, as the baby boy passed away last week. Too many complications, the child would never recover, they lost hope, upon the advice of the doctors the plug was pulled.

Even as I type these words, my heart is shattered for my young friend.

How will this one end? I don't know. How will my friend cope? Will their be guilt? Will the strain ruin her relationship with her boyfriend, and leave her a young single mom? How will she deal, how will she heal?

And seriously, why would she have thought of me when her baby was near death? Why me? I'm the chick at the shop, we talk about music, and clothes and hair and babies, and the beach...I'm no one to her. I care about her, because she reminds me of me, but I never told her that, we just shoot the breeze once in a while.

How will God use me in this? I don't know. I've never found being overly pushy on the God subject to be very effective when dealing with non believers. You know the song..."They will know we are Christians by our love" that is my usual approach, I just try and love people.

Today, I am so thankful that I KNOW God well enough to know that a baby's short life and death wasn't for nothing. It is part of His plan, and for His glory, that is all I need to know. And as for my young friend, I will just keep loving her the only way I know how, by talking about hair and clothes and the beach, and I believe that the Spirit will give me the right words if/when I need them.

Monday, July 21, 2008

And now presenting...


The Eenigenburg family minus the little miracle baby boy

Friday, July 18, 2008

all faith night at the railcats...

I forgot to mention this...last Friday night was all faith night at the Railcats game. It was a long night, but fun. Anyway, the national anthem was sung by 3 little girls, twins and an older sister, and their dad. The announcer said the last name, and when I saw them on the screen I kept thinking OH HOW CUTE is that!!! The quartet did a fantastic job...I'm not kidding you, it was top notch, and the announcer said the name one last time thanking them for singing: "Jeff IIinegburg and his 3 daughters" hhmmmm and then I saw Patty EENIGENBURG from First CRC who joins us on Wednesday mornings (remember the one who was having contractions during our wrap up last year?!) for WIW on the field taking photos. OHHHHH it was Patty's husband and her three daughters singing the national anthem.

Way to go hubby and girls, it was really wonderful! If anyone got a picture of them, send it to me, and I'll post it here. cevans@netnitco.net.

I just talked to Kathy!!

I am overwhelmed by mixed emotions right now. It was soooo good to talk to my friend, yet I'm sitting here in front of my computer with a lump in my throat.

The Vander Tuig's have arrived safely in California, and Kathy was busy setting up her kitchen while we chatted.

Turns out Kathy had heard about the blog already en route to her new home. Her computer is not hooked up yet, but I told her she'd better comment on it soon!

I admit that I have not had time to read more about the tabernacle. Gayle DeVries had an interesting blog entry last week. She is on vacation, but when she gets back, maybe she will post it here, and we can discuss what she wrote if she doesn't mind. Along those same lines, I realize that it is not so much the studies themselves that are important, it's the way the study causes me to think about and trust God...it is my heart that needs to change, not that more learning needs to enter my brain.

Take our study last year, Believing God, the way God used His Word, the study, shared experiences of others, and just changed my heart is amazing stuff. I wonder if this happens to you sometimes too, my own reaction to things often surprises me.

Here's an example. Last week, on the 15 year anniversary of my marriage to my husband, he unexpectedly stopped in while I worked. Awwww, I thought how cute, he stopped in to say hello. Nope. He had a funny look on his face. He had just talked to the owners of the rented house we live in, and they told him that one of their relatives wanted to rent the house. UGH. I hate moving...and to where...and how are we gonna...and...and...and....I felt my blood pressure rise, and I was down right annoyed that, on our anniversary, this was being dumped on me. I wanted to cry. I was a little snippy with my husband, I said fine we'll talk about it when I get home, and he left with his shoulders a little slumped feeling the sting of my reaction and knowing that his timing stunk. Oh, and did I mention that my husband's job stinks and he's in the process of finding a new one...ugh ugh ugh and ugh!

Well, I felt tears welling up...every failure of life weighed down on me as I thought things like, if I hadn't gotten pregnant before I was married, and had 2 kids when I met Ted, and then another 1 year later, and, if we hadn't started out with a family of 5, and if I'd stayed working at the bank instead of staying home with my kids, and if we'd bought a house by now, none of this would be happening, and we'd be out enjoying a nice anniversary dinner, but NO here we are...

I felt sorry for myself a few more minutes and then I didn't even have to ask for it, The Spirit got control of me somehow, thru all my self loathing and pity, and there it was a fresh feeling, brand new, completely opposite...amazing. Well, I can't change the past, I have a roof over my head tonight, I'm sure we'll figure something out b/c we always do, I'm going home to my husband, who loves me, even when I'm snotty, God sent him to me, God provides for me, He'll help us work this out, He loves me, He has forgiven the past, He accepts me as is, that is enough for me.

Peace and calm flow through my heart as I text my husband, because I know him enough to know that he is re-living every one of his failures just like I was... "When are we going to start trusting God to take care of us?" He texts back "now". We are okay.

I stopped at Hallmark on the way home from work and read every card in the anniversary section, none of them said the right thing. So, I opted for a dairy queen cake instead, Ted LOVES ice cream, they wrote I love you on it for me. I presented it to my darling husband when I got home and he smiled the warmest smile I've seen in a while.

God will give us what we need when we need it. I believe that with all my heart. Praise Him.

Monday, July 14, 2008

The Tabernacle

I've managed to read only a few of the Bible verses containing tabernacle references, and already I can not wait for the study this fall!

Each day in the morning and the evening the High Priests were commanded to burn incense on the golden alter. They left the incense burning all day as a pleasing aroma to the Lord. The incense was considered holy and made up of special spices, that were expensive. The incense was also a symbol of prayers wafting up to heaven on behalf of the people.

In Psalm 141:2 David says, "May my prayer be set before you like incense; may the lifting up of my hands be like the evening sacrifice."

I want my prayers waft up to heaven like a pleasing aroma...how about you?

Anyone else reading about the tabernacle? Would you be willing to share what you are learning, or what you've learned in the past about the tabernacle?

It would be awesome if this could be an interactive blog, feel free to post comments and questions, insights and thoughts. Not just in response to the tabernacle study but also tell us; how has "Believing God" impacted you? Do you think back to the study when trouble comes your way? Have you had any "I'M BELIEVING GOD" moments? Share if you'd like!

Well, I have a quiet house tonight, so I'm going to read some more, hope you are getting the opportunity to spend some time with God too. Summer is very busy at our house, and without a study to keep me on track, I've felt disconnected from God lately. For me, this blog, and knowing I should post something on it, is a nudge to crack open the Bible and get back on track. I am so thankful for that nudge.

Thursday, July 10, 2008

The volunteers are pouring in...

Thank you to everyone for emails and notes of encouragement, and offers to help!

Can I please ask you all to be in prayer for the right person/people to head up the childcare for WIW. Kathy managed all the child care issues the last couple of years, calling volunteers etc. Unfortunately, I work, and adding those phone calls etc to my day is not an option.

What we need:

A person, or a team of 2-4 people to find volunteers and make a schedule for child care helpers. Reminder phone calls were previously done on Monday. Also, it is nice if the bigger kids can have some type of Bible story video, or activity to do for part of the time. This person can still attend the study, they would just be in charge of getting to the nursery and making sure all the volunteers showed up etc. In my opinion a nice team of 4 women means your duty is only 1x per month, I am praying for that scenario, but if someone desires to handle it on their own, that would be great as well.

We are also in need of a person to make coffee. Last year I was the coffee maker, this year I will be setting up video equipment etc instead. Depending on how much good coffee means to you in the morning, you might want to be in prayer for that too.

Looking to next year, it has always been my passion to offer a night session of WIW Bible study. I will put out a sign up sheet at church soon to see if there is enough interest. I would facilitate that study. I'm really excited. I'm hoping to secure Tuesday nights, and stay on exactly the same schedule as the morning group, that way if you can't make a Wednesday morning, you can participate on Tuesday night.

I am still planning to facilitate a group in the morning also, which is why I am trying to pawn all the work onto everyone else. ;-)

I hope you are as excited as I am to begin the study. In the intro for "A Woman's Heart: God's Dwelling Place it says, "Discover the parallels of the Tabernacle's building and your life as a chosen vessel of God". I plan to get out my study Bible tonight and find all the passages with the word tabernacle in them. If any of you do the same, please share what you are learning about the tabernacle, if anything strikes you as interesting or new information... let us know what the Spirit is showing you.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Hi Ladies!

Just a little introduction regarding this blog. As all of you know, my dear friend Kathy Vander Tuig is on her way to California and so I begin the solo journey as WIW leader. I am blessed to have amazing women volunteering to help me, thank you so much!

First a little background on "my story" and who Kathy Vander Tuig is to me...it's time for you all to know. I grew up in a wonderful, loving CRC home. We were faithful church attenders and I loved God. I often sang in churches, and my sister used to say she could picture me being the next Amy Grant.

I will not go into details of the twists and turns my life took after I graduated from high school, got pregnant, then married, had another child, and ended up divorced, but I can tell you that all of those events left me bitter and sad, feeling worthless and far from a relationship with God.

I met and married my awesome husband Ted in 1993, and we had another child together bringing our family to 5. For more than 10 years, we bounced from church to church. Deep down I felt drawn to "church", but we never stayed at any one very long, and our lifestyle wasn't what it should have been if we were walking closely with God. Ted called it "flying under the radar". We felt obligated to go, but were unwilling serve, and get totally involved in church.

So, are you wondering what in the world I am doing leading a Bible study yet?!

God was working in our hearts all along, our kids loved youth group, VBS, Sunday School etc, and deep down Ted and I knew we were in the wrong.

We had been bouncing in and out of Community Church for some time, when one morning, there in the front of church, stood KATHY VER BEEK (Vander Tuig). Kathy had been a classmate of mine at Illiana, and I'd bet I hadn't seen her since graduation day. Kathy was the life and soul of our class. I don't know how best to describe her, but you know how she is...fun, lively, laughing, and SMART.

I was not one to walk to the front of church, but the day the Vander Tuig family was introduced, I told my family we were going to say Hi! They thought I'd lost my mind, but they came with me anyway. Clearly the Spirit was working in my heart and God had plans to unite Kathy and I in a friendship that would change the course of my entire life.

Soon after, Kathy called and invited us to small group. I had planned to make an excuse not to, but Ted said we needed to go, and we did.

Thru the last 2 years, wounds in my life were healed miraculously by God's mercy on me. Kathy and Bryan were our first friends EVER to talk openly with us about God. They started to see God working in us, and helped us to see that God loved us in spite of our serious wandering off the path of life.

Kathy asked me to facilitate a Bible study, and I said yes. She didn't know at the time, but this event changed me forever. Kathy believed in me, and in doing so, she helped me to believe in myself again.

Last night we stopped over to say goodbye to the Vander Tuigs. Oh how I will miss my buddy Kathy, and I thank God for her...well, again, I'm at a loss for words...and that doesn't happen often.

So, I go it alone for WIW, here is the good news: I have seen first hand what my life looks like without God leading me. Although today, I am sad and a little nervous about jumping into women's ministry leadership without my faithful, smart, organized, and dear friend, I know that God will provide me with all that I need to make this year great.

Excitement is already building for study in the fall.

Thank you to Gayle DeVries for helping me decide on a study:

A Woman's Heart: God's Dwelling Place By: Beth Moore
Discover the parallels of the Tabernacle's building and your life as a chosen vessel of God. Taped in Beth Moore's home church in Houston, this updated edition of A Woman's Heart reflects not only the original study, but all that God has done in Beth's life in the past decade. Regardless of whether you studied Beth Moore's first study with LifeWay years ago - or are experiencing it for the first time - you'll find this study well worth the journey.

Check out the introduction and video clips at:
http://www.lifewaystores.com/lwstore/product.asp?isbn=1415834970

Please feel free to comment on this blog, I will be updating frequently to keep you involved in the group even when we aren't meeting.

Soon, I will be posting ways that you can help for next year. Be in prayer to see if God is leading you to volunteer in this ministry.