Turn your eyes upon Jesus

Well, it's always interesting to learn that when I feel completely overwhelmed by life, there are many others right there with me feeling the same way.

Is it the approach of the Christmas season that has us stressing? Watching the calander fill up, writing lists of things we'll need to purchase and wondering where all the money will come from to pay for it, or maybe it's the gloomy weather.

I spent the beginning of this week praying for a new attitude. I knew I needed a fix, but I wanted it quick, and you guys might have noticed, I'm not a great listener, I generally like to do the talking. So pray as I might, that quick fix just didn't happen.

I love facilitating WIW studies at church but this lousy attitude had started to creep into me and had so overtaken my normally cheerful self that even people at my shop were worried and asking what was wrong. Am I that transparent?!

I'm guessing the main root of my problem is this cold I have that just wants to make me stay in bed all day. Nonetheless, I headed to bible study Tuesday night knowing full well the women would see right through me. Just before we started the lesson I popped what I thought was a normal cough drop into my mouth only to discover as I tried to say tabernacle and it came out taberblabble that what I had put into my mouth was a chloriseptic drop which would numb my tongue and throat. Lovely.

So with a lousy attitude and a completely numb tongue I bumbled my way thru the first bit of study until we came to the question that dealt with our "pitchers" getting empty, making us unable to "wash the feet of others". And the conversations just flowed. We are all feeling overwhelmed or have been in the recent past. We all get in over our heads and we all struggle to keep a focus on what is important. We skip our one on one God time because we think we are too busy, and then we throw up our hands in distress over how empty we feel. Have mercy on us Lord, we are so human.

Wednesday morning the conversation turned the same way (perhaps I led it that way?) we're all just too busy, and all the busy work sucks the joy from our lives. One of the women in the group who I admire more than she'll ever know, simply walked up to me silently, and handed me a piece of scrap paper:
Being
Under
Satan's
Yoke

Oh yes, that is exactly how it feels. I want to cheerfully serve in my church, work in my shop, sing in the choir, watch my daughter's basketball games, help my son with his homework, cook, clean, do laundry but the yoke seems really heavy at the moment, I am too busy and in my view there is nothing I can stop doing to make me less busy.

So yesterday after bible study I went home, turned off my phone (wow right?!) and slept for 2 hours on the couch. When I woke up I started humming the hymn;
Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
Look full in His wonderful face,
and the things of earth
will grow strangely dim
in the light of His glory and grace.

Oh yes, there it was, the truth in a song. So strage that I can hear the same thing thru the Bible, words spoken by my fellow believers and in my heart I already knew the answer, but somehow there it was, just how I needed to hear it.

I can't stop living in this world, I can't hide from my responsibilities, and I can't be a crab forever.

The only thing I can do is turn to Jesus, and bask in the light of His glory.

Praise God I feel "normal" today well except for the stuffy head and soar throat but somehow it seems tolerable today. Thank you to The Great Physician who knows when we hurt and how to heal us.